I love him. Leave him. I love him. Leave him. I love him leave him.
I am the little mermaid, underwater, plucking the petals off flowers. Yet I cannot breath.
Damn I wish I was a mermaid.
Sunday, July 22, 2012
Sunday, July 15, 2012
Saying Goodbye
Saying Goodbye to the People you love is always the hardest thing to do, even when it is the last thing left to do.
I have been looking for a new place to live for the last week. I have been keeping it a secret for the sanity of both parties. Although I feel like I did it because I did not want to hurt him or cause more conflict. However, I probably did it because I do not want him to be mad at me. I am selfish and I want to be the person that was the winner.
Well I came home today from looking at apartment for 8 hours. (Still apartment-less) And I get dumped. Awesome. It is not like it is the first time he has done this, but for some reason I know this time it is real. Because this time I am leaving. I hope one of my applications was the first today so I can just get a place.
Saying goodbye is so hard.
I have been looking for a new place to live for the last week. I have been keeping it a secret for the sanity of both parties. Although I feel like I did it because I did not want to hurt him or cause more conflict. However, I probably did it because I do not want him to be mad at me. I am selfish and I want to be the person that was the winner.
Well I came home today from looking at apartment for 8 hours. (Still apartment-less) And I get dumped. Awesome. It is not like it is the first time he has done this, but for some reason I know this time it is real. Because this time I am leaving. I hope one of my applications was the first today so I can just get a place.
Saying goodbye is so hard.
Thursday, October 6, 2011
Wednesday, March 9, 2011
Bettering my self
Since I decided to go to law school, I feel as though my life as fallen apart. I have come to realize this is because my self confidence has been thrown out the window. This is not to say I am the only person is the whole world, this has happened to. I am saying it because I want it to change. I have gained 50-60 lbs since I was accepted into law school. Which has been due to my stress level, and emotional eating. And not having time or the passion to cook anymore.
I used to co-own a freaking health food catering company! WTH!! I know it has been wrong, But I still did not pay attention. I fell deeper and deeper into a hole of shit, or should I say lard and sugar. My most violent addiction is to sweets and breads.
Now as I turn a corner and try and pass the state Bar, I am going to try and gain my confidence back. My mom told me recently I am so lucky because I have so many people that love me (her, the bf and the cat). She is right, although on most days this is all blurred by my own self-hating thoughts. This needs to change. And so in my motivation I decided to start a new blog. I have no idea what this blog will be about, but it will be a place for me to vomit out my thoughts. Whether it be dieting, education, working, jobs, or the oh so common and most interesting subject MEN!
I used to co-own a freaking health food catering company! WTH!! I know it has been wrong, But I still did not pay attention. I fell deeper and deeper into a hole of shit, or should I say lard and sugar. My most violent addiction is to sweets and breads.
Now as I turn a corner and try and pass the state Bar, I am going to try and gain my confidence back. My mom told me recently I am so lucky because I have so many people that love me (her, the bf and the cat). She is right, although on most days this is all blurred by my own self-hating thoughts. This needs to change. And so in my motivation I decided to start a new blog. I have no idea what this blog will be about, but it will be a place for me to vomit out my thoughts. Whether it be dieting, education, working, jobs, or the oh so common and most interesting subject MEN!
Monday, March 7, 2011
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